Paving a new career path in a foreign land

When you take the tough decision of moving overseas as an NRI wife, you have a zillion emotions and thoughts flooding your mind. How is it going to be? Will I have friends? How often will I see my family? What about my career? Is this decision worth all the sacrifice? Being a thorough professional and workaholic, when I had to take the decision of moving out of my country after marriage, the first thought that came to my mind was, I have to give up all that I have built so far. Also the fact that mine was a love marriage had no scope of any alternative. It was invariably my own decision of crossing borders to experience a new life but I must admit I was a little reluctant. After a lot of debate between my mind and heart, I reached the conclusion of taking this new life in my stride.When you have taken the plunge, better be ready for the flak as well. Taking further steps following your decision, you might get a bit jittery, as that's when you realise the shocking truth of starting from scratch. So when you finally fly so many miles apart from your life that you built with so much hard work, finally having reached in a good place in your life professionally, you are hit hard with the truth of going back to the pavilion. A lot of people tell me you can do a lot of different things or may be change your domain of job or try something new, "We also did it". I only ask them one question — "Why did you change your job and switch to a completely different career?" Their answer usually is "We hated what we did in our previous job." I felt surprised and then glad at the same time, I loved my work, I used to get excited with the fact that I have to go to office on a Monday(despite the Monday blues), I loved it thoroughly and enjoyed it, so changing it never really crossed my mind. I only remember getting appreciated and promoted for my work. I am getting paid for something I enjoy doing. Why should I change?A tingle went down my spine as I submitted my resignation without any lucrative opportunity on my plate to look forward to. I have to admit, even though I got my visa in a weeks' time, it took me several months to finally put down my papers.I tried to look at the bright side and took a more optimistic approach towards it after having those thoughts battling in my mind for days. I started to act on it rather than brooding over and sulking. And then I thought, let me be a little adventurous, and try to do something new in my own field. Yes, probably a break after working for such a long time won't hurt. I can travel, take up some hobbies, learn new languages, or go for higher studies and I am happy to say I did quiet a few of these things. But I did feel intimidated and lost my confidence a bit when I lost my job title or my identity for that matter. Coming in a new country on a spouse visa, you are a dependent and to even open your bank account or get a mobile no, you have to route it through your husband. It really pricks hard on you when once you were an individual with your own identity and financially independence. I don't remember asking for money from my parents since taking up a job although I was really young at that time.In a new country, when you try to talk to new people and hunt for a suitable job for yourself, despite having a work permit, no one really responds and your decade of an experience looks like zilch. There are very few people you meet who genuinely help you and the same goes with making new friends. The city is cluttered with expats and their respective wives, everyone trying to find an opportunity here. I always believe that the metrics of any business is the same and only the demographics change, but no one wants to believe in you and give you a chance.I would say I was lucky and after a lot of scouting, I got some great opportunities but the fact of the matter remains, is it justifying my skills? We all have our set standards and do not want to downgrade ourselves, we need to analyse how is it contributing to our personality rather than just doing a mere job. No matter how adventurous one is, if you don't get the encouragement and positive response to your skills and personality, you do tend to get bogged down. Before moving to London I had 9 years of experience without a single break. Being on the top of my game, I was striving for something more, more challenging. But I am a fighter and kept going strong until I finally landed up with an international assignment. The only way I looked at it was, It's a huge risk I might be taking but yes I am happy, by giving up what I built and following my heart I landed up being in a position where I can experiment, speculate and walk on a new road. I do not yet know if that will be best or worst for me, but it definitely is going to be one hell of a journey.