Stop rewarding everything: Are we killing natural curiosity?

A small, very normal scene:A child finishes homework. Parent says, “Good, now you can watch TV.”Child cleans room. “Okay, I’ll order your favourite food.”Child reads a book. “Very good, I’ll buy you something this weekend.”Looks harmless. Encouraging, even. But if you zoom out and watch this pattern for a few years, something interesting starts happening. Children slowly begin to ask one question before doing almost anything:“What will I get?”Not in a greedy way. In a trained way.We didn’t plan this. No parent sits and decides, “I will raise my child to expect rewards for everything.” It just happens slowly. We want them to study, so we motivate. We want them to behave, so we incentivise. We want them to read, help, practice, clean, finish, participate, so we attach small rewards everywhere like little price tags on behaviour.And slowly, life becomes a reward chart.The problem is not that rewards are bad. The issue is that, when everything is rewarded, nothing is performed simply because it is worthwhile anymore.A child who previously drew since drawing was fun now draws because they'll be given a star sticker.A child who used to read because the story was interesting is now reading because there is a prize.The child who was assisting in the kitchen because they wanted to assist in the kitchen, now assists because they would receive extra screen time.We accidentally turn curiosity into a transaction.This has been studied by psychologists. When individuals get rewards in something that they are already enjoying, their natural interest declines at times. The activity is no longer considered as play but rather as work to be paid. When the reward is eliminated, so is the activity.You can see this in small ways. Some children love asking random questions. Endless questions. Why is the sky pink today? Why do cats hate water? Who invented exams? These are curiosity questions. Nobody is giving marks for these questions. Nobody is giving chocolate for these questions. They are asking because their brain is wandering and wondering.That wandering is important. That’s where real learning starts.But if childhood becomes a checklist of tasks followed by rewards, children slowly stop doing things unless there is something at the end of it. They don’t ask, “Is this interesting?” They ask, “Is this worth it?”And that’s a very adult way to look at the world for a ten-year-old.Also, something else quietly disappears when everything is scheduled and rewarded: boredom. And boredom is actually where many hobbies, ideas, games, and interests are born. A bored child builds things, draws random comics, makes up games, rearranges their room, reads random books, asks strange questions, learns weird facts.A child who is always busy and always rewarded rarely gets bored.A child who never gets bored rarely gets very curious.Maybe we don’t need to stop rewards completely. Celebration is nice. Appreciation is important. But maybe not for brushing teeth, finishing homework, packing bags, and doing basic responsibilities.Some things children should do because:It’s their workIt’s their homeIt’s interestingIt’s kindIt’s part of lifeNot because there is always a prize waiting at the end.Because if every effort has a reward, children might grow up thinking effort only makes sense when there is a reward.And curiosity, unfortunately, does not come with prizes.It comes with questions.