Does romance and intimacy die down with age?

Romance is for the youth. At least that’s how society thinks. Most assume that with age, romance and passion become irrelevant. As decades pass, romance starts to wear off. Physical intimacy is assumed to be off the table. But is it really so? A recent study from the University of New Hampshire is pushing back hard against this narrative. And they have data to match!

The research, published in the Journal of Sex Research, found something that would challenge the stereotypes about desire and aging.

Passion does not die down as you age

The researchers interviewed 100 single adults between the ages of 60 and 83, and found that they continue to prioritize intimacy in their romantic relationships. This further emphasizes that desires do not leave the room as you age.

"Many participants expressed that a relationship without sex felt more like a friendship. They were seeking romance and physical connection, viewing sexual intimacy as essential to their relationships," Lauren Harris, assistant professor of human development and family studies, said in a statement.

The participants in this study were 100 single men and women, all active users of online dating platforms. Among the participants, a staggering 97% emphasized the importance of sexual intimacy in a romantic relationship. And 72% participants said that they would not pursue a relationship lacking sexual activity.

"We just have more single older adults today than we’ve ever had before. Historically, someone might be widowed or divorced later in life and be single for five or 10 years. Now they could be single for 30 years, and that changes how we think about relationships and partnering," Harris added.

The study also challenges the notion that age-related physical changes hinder intimacy. Instead, the participants expressed that they were open to adapting, even if it meant with the help of medical support. This redefines what intimacy means, or adjusting how often or intensely they connect, to maintain closeness.

On the other hand, the research also showed that older adults often face challenges in dating, due to the limited access to partners, particularly for women who statistically outnumber single men in older age groups.

“The findings reshape expectations about aging and demonstrates that sexuality remains an important part of life across the lifespan," Harris said.

The researchers also emphasized that it is important to understand this demographic in order to advocate for open discussions about sexual health among older adults, especially as sexually transmitted infections rise in this age group.