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5 weird things people do in love and why, as per psychology

etimes.in | Last updated on - May 13, 2026, 21:43 IST
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Weird things people do in love

Love is a universal feeling. And sometimes, it makes us do weird things. One minute you’re a functioning adult, and the next you’re analyzing the punctuation in a three-word text like it’s a Da Vinci code.

If you’ve ever looked at your own behaviour in a relationship and thought, "Who is this person?"—don't worry. It’s usually just your brain trying to navigate the high-stakes world of human connection. Here are some strange things we do when we’re caught in the feelings, and the actual reasons behind them.


2/6

The "secret test" phase

What it looks like: Picking a tiny, unnecessary argument or acting "fine" (when you aren't) just to see if your partner notices or fights for you.

The reality: This is basically a security check. When we feel vulnerable, asking for reassurance directly feels too risky—what if they say no? So, we create these little "tests" to see if they’ll show up.

The Fix: It’s a defensive move, but it backfires because your partner isn't a mind reader. If you’re feeling insecure, just say it. It saves a lot of unnecessary drama.


3/6

Turning into a human mirror

What it looks like: You start using their slang, liking their obscure indie bands, or even sitting the exact same way they do.

The reality: This is called mirroring. Your brain has these things called mirror neurons that fire when you're deeply vibing with someone. It’s an evolutionary "hack" to build rapport and show the other person you’re on their team.

The vibe: It’s not that you’re losing your personality; you’re just creating a "shared language." It’s actually a sign of high empathy.

4/6

The text message autopsy

What it looks like: Scrolling back through six months of old messages or re-reading a single "Goodnight" text 20 times.

The reality: Your brain is addicted to the dopamine hit that comes with romance. When things are uncertain or you're missing them, your mind goes into "detective mode" to find clues that everything is okay.

The trap: We often try to find meaning where there isn't any. A "K" is sometimes just a "K," not a sign that the relationship is ending.


5/6

The "vulnerability hangover" fight

What it looks like: You have an amazing, deeply intimate date where you share your secrets... and then the very next day, you’re picking a fight over who forgot to take out the trash.

The reality: Getting close to someone is terrifying. For a lot of us, that level of intimacy triggers a "fight or flight" response. You pick a fight to create a little bit of distance so you can feel "safe" and independent again.

The fix: Recognize the pattern. If you feel an urge to snap right after a big emotional breakthrough, take a breath. You're just scared, and that's okay.

6/6

Turning trash into treasures

What it looks like: Keeping a crumpled movie ticket, a dried-up flower, or a hoodie that smells like them as if they were holy relics.

The reality: This is associative learning. Your brain has linked that object to the rush of oxytocin you feel when you’re with them. The object becomes an emotional anchor—a way to "feel" them when they aren't there.

The vibe: It’s harmless, sentimental hoarding. As long as you aren’t building a shrine in a literal closet, enjoy the memento.



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Copyright © May 17, 2026, 04.41AM IST Bennett, Coleman & Co. Ltd. All rights reserved. For reprint rights: Times Syndication Service