Facts vs. fear: How to talk to your kids about stranger danger

When it comes to our children's safety, warning them against strangers is not enough. There is much more to it than just instilling fear. Experts believe laying down the facts is more important than just telling them to be aware of an unusual looking man or woman. It is believed that most criminal activities against kids such as abduction and abuse are committed by people who are actually close to the children. The worst part is that it often gets overlooked or people choose to sweep it under the rug due to societal pressures.

So if you're still wondering what is the right way to talk to kids about 'stranger danger'? Here's a guide.

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While talking to your child about stranger danger, make sure to be elaborate. Define 'stranger' to them. Do not be vague about it.

A stranger can be anybody, who is unfamiliar to your child. Irrespective of whether he or she is friendly, close to the parents, grandparents, one's relatives, etc.... does not matter! If your child is not comfortable around that person, if they resist being hugged or kissed by that person, then respect their decision.

As discussed, danger is not just limited to strangers. Parents should understand that abuse in all its forms can be perpetrated by people known to the child. This could include family, friends, relatives, and anyone they know closely, including teachers and trainers. That said, while talking about 'stranger danger', do not just tell your child to stay away from people they don't know, rather explain to them why some people they know may also be 'bad' people.

As a parent, your sole focus should be the safety of your child. But children are innocent. Anyone who is nice to them can lure them, both a stranger or a familiar person. So how do you keep them safe when you're not around? The best way to do that is by teaching them the importance of consent i.e. telling them that they control who can and cannot touch their bodies and when they choose to leave a situation.

Parents should be aware when their child is not comfortable. Look for signs and break it up when it's happening. There is no wrong in supporting your child, even if it means offending a few.

Unlike adults, children take more time to process information. Furthermore, to defy and disobey adults can be extremely difficult for kids, which is why when you tell them about consent, they're likely to be confused. That said, role-playing can come in handy in these situations. This teaches kids different ways to respond in different scenarios and also the ability to trust their instincts, and handle uncomfortable situations.

Any time your child comes up to you and says they're uncomfortable by the presence of someone, make sure to provide support. Trust them and back them up when you see something wrong happening. Chiding them for not kissing or hugging a relative can be traumatic for your child. Not only are you telling them that they have no control over their feelings, but you're also making them feel shame for being rude. AND YOU DON'T WANT THAT FOR YOUR CHILD!