Amid loss and joy, I hold on to gratitude for my little one: Bhavana

For actor Bhavana Ramanna, motherhood has arrived wrapped in both blessing and heartbreak. After sharing with Bangalore Times her journey of preparing for motherhood through IVF, she has now welcomed a baby girl. “I was all set to deliver twins. But one of my little ones, unfortunately, didn’t make it… I’m still learning to cope with the situation,” she tells us.

‘ALL WAS GOING WELL, UNTIL AFTER MY SEEMANTHA CEREMONY’
Bhavana recalls that her pregnancy had been going smoothly and she had remained active throughout. “But soon after my seemantha, I began noticing that I couldn’t sit for long. There would be stiffness, and after a while, I began spotting.”

‘WE PRAYED THE SITUATION WOULD IMPROVE BY THE NEXT DAY, BUT IT DIDN’T'
Bhavana adds, “Since the hospital I was consulting was far away, my family suggested we visit another doctor, who had also delivered my nieces and nephews. The moment she saw me, she said, ‘Bhavana, you are sitting on a time bomb." The next few hours, she was told, would be crucial. “When the doctor conducted tests, it was revealed that the umbilical cord — which normally carries blood to the baby — was flowing in reverse. The heartbeat of one baby had already dropped to 50 per cent, while the other still seemed normal. We also learnt that one was underweight, and the next few hours would be critical. We prayed the situation would improve by the next day, but it didn’t. I was wheeled into the OT for an emergency operation,” she says.

‘I CANNOT EVEN BEGIN TO DESCRIBE HOW I FELT IN THAT MOMENT’
She tells us that the memory of that moment is etched deeply in her. “I cannot even begin to describe how I felt when I saw one of the heartbeats drop to zero on the monitor. I was told I had lost one of my little ones. My condition didn’t allow me to wait full term, and surgery had to be conducted at 32 weeks,” Bhavana recalls.
‘I WAS TOLD BOTH BABIES WERE GIRLS SOON AFTER SURGERY'
The grief was overwhelming. “Nothing prepares you for this kind of loss. It is something only a mother who has been through it can truly understand. I am grateful for my daughter, but a part of my heart will always grieve for the one I couldn’t bring home. I was told both babies were girls soon after surgery — while one didn’t make it, my other precious one had to be taken to the NICU to ensure her well-being. Having waited so long and carried them both, I really didn’t know what to do: whether to cry at the loss of one or celebrate the arrival of the other. It was bittersweet, and I had to stay in the hospital for a long time until my daughter was declared medically fit to come home,” Bhavana says.

‘I AM SLOWLY LEARNING TO LOOK AT THE BRIGHTER SIDE OF LIFE’
She has since named her daughter after her maternal grandmother. “She is Rukmini Bhavana Ramanna, born on August 20. I’m deeply grateful to my doctor, Mukta Nadig, for guiding me through this delicate journey. I’m now home with my little one. She is slowly on the way to well-being, and my family has been rallying behind me. I am slowly learning to look at the brighter side of life — with my little Rukmini by my side,” she says.