Domestic strife makes kids swing towards bad behaviour, says study

PUNE: Deviant behaviour among children in most cases stems from dysfunctional homes, says a report prepared by Dnyana Devi Childline.
It pushes them to sexual and physical abuse, bullying and substance addiction, the city-based 24-hour helpline for children in distress supported by Union ministry of women and child development has found.
The helpline compiled the data for a six-month period from March to August 2015 and when analysed, it showed that in most cases distressed children came from homes where disputes among family members or parents are frequent.
Director of the helpline Anuradha Sahasrabudhe said children reacting to family problems has gone beyond tantrums, talking back, or defying orders.
“In nearly 95% of the cases we deal with, the problem can be traced to family trouble, squabbling parents or a tense environment at home, with the child usually becoming the punching bag. Children have fragile minds which can be misguided easily. They can be pushed to extreme steps like harming themselves or their siblings, running away from home, bullying classmates or doing drugs,” she added.
A tense environment at home and not enough quality time with the family increases cases of misbehaviour among children. From it rise conflicts with parents, and suicidal tendencies, said experts working with the helpline.
Hectic daily schedules, excessive and, at times, unsupervised exposure to the internet, video games and laptops are other factors. When opportunities for outdoor activities are blocked, it leads to a build-up of energy, which finds release in destructive ways, they added.
The organisation has recommended talks and counselling sessions for parents to deal with the problem.
“Parents must be educated about the situation and ways in which they need to deal with their children through counselling sessions or workshops,” said Sahasrabudhe.
When children show waywardness, counselling entire families, including grandparents and siblings, is required, said city-based psychologist Himani Chaphekar.
“Children cannot adequately communicate depression, suppressed anger or frustration. They usually don’t fully understand what they are experiencing themselves. So, a child bullying his classmates may actually be his way of releasing suppressed anger. It may have something to do with a dominant father at home. Even the most well-educated and decent of families has very complex problems and relationships,” she said.
Other experts believe the problem is not just with the child’s immediate family set-up. Sociologist Vidyut Bhagwat said, “Today’s fast-paced lifestyle subtly sanctions much violence which family members, or members of the children’s private sphere accept. As a society, we are becoming intolerant with no dissenting viewpoint acceptable to us. Lack of quality dialogue between parents and children, or even between teachers and students, is making children behave in this manner.”