Time to educate kids on street sexual harassment: Experts

CHENNAI: A day after ushering in the New Year, adults in Prabha Durairaj’s house were discussing the molestation of women in Bengaluru on New Year eve. Even as they expressed shock, Prabha’s young daughter asked a simple question: “What happened there, amma? What did those men do to the women?”
“For a moment, I was confused and just changed the channel beaming the news,” says the software professional.“Since she is just eight, I had no idea what to say or how to explain what had happened.”
This situation has been playing out in many households. And child right activists and psychiatrists feel it is the right time to talk to children about street sexual harassment in an age-appropriate manner — young girls face it almost daily and boys need to be taught about consent and appropriate behaviour.
“Children have access to so much information and any child who comes across this incident is bound to be curious. There is no point shying away from it so use it as a teachable moment,” says Vidya Reddy, founder, Tulir – Centre for the Prevention and Healing of Child Sexual Abuse. “To a young child, you can say there are some men who think it is funny or exciting to grab hold of a woman but it is not nice especially since no one likes to be grabbed.” And, boys and girls should be addressed differently, she feels.
Child psychiatrist Dr V Jayanthini says it is essential to talk to young boys. “We have got to start talking to them about responsible and appropriate behaviour. It is natural to get attracted to the opposite sex but even before they reach that age it is essential to teach them not to hurt others.”
Children aged 13 and above can also be taught concepts like consent, she feels. “It is essential to explain all the nuances to them – to tell them that even if the other person gives consent, if he/she is not a major it is still wrong…,” says Dr Jayanthini.
Many new-age parents are aware of their role. “As the father of an eight-year-old boy, I am conscious that even the way I treat my wife and mother will serve as an example for my son,” says businessman Manoj Nair.
Experts feel this is the time to bust myths and prejudices. Jasmeen Patheja, founder of Bengaluru-based Blank Noise, a community/public art project seeking to confront street harassment, says it is important to create an environment where sexual violence is not dismissed. “That it is discussed in a way where girls are not warned only to be blamed. Children need to know (in a child friendly/age appropriate way) that this happens, and they also need to feel they can speak, that they will be heard.”
Activists feel schools need to step in. “We need to talk about gender roles and stereotypes, which can be integrated into the curriculum,” says Shweta Shankar, manager, psycho-social programme, PCVC (International Foundation for Crime Prevention and Victim Care).