From facing trolls over husband Shardul Bayas’ past divorces to choosing not to have kids, Nehha Pendse opens up about her career, marriage, and life

Nehha Pendse, who is popularly for her roles in shows like "May I Come In Madam" and "Bhabi Ji Ghar Par Hain," is currently impressing audiences with her work in Marathi cinema. The actress recently joined The Male Feminist where she opened up about becoming financially independent, her career, and her relationships. She also spoke about her marriage to husband Shardul Bayas, dealing with trolls regarding his past divorces and her decision not to have children. (Photo: Instagram)

In my 20s, things changed when my father’s business took a hit and we went through a difficult phase. Earlier, I used to think about work from a different perspective, but then it became about supporting my family and helping run the house. We never spoke about it directly at home, but I sensed something was wrong from small things, like being told to stay quiet or noticing changes in the atmosphere. It slowly became obvious that our situation was getting difficult—even the house we were living in was at stake. There came a point when stepping up was necessary, and that’s when I started working more for financial reasons rather than just for my passion. (Photo: Instagram)

No, I didn’t really experience childhood like a typical child actor. I understood all of this much later. At that time, I was just busy working and doing what I had to do. I didn’t enjoy college life either. I never had a boyfriend—my first relationship happened when I was 29. Before that, I wasn’t even thinking about such things. Until around 25, my focus was only on work—earning money, becoming independent, and protecting myself because I felt the world could be tough. After 25, when I had some financial stability, I started feeling a sense of loneliness and began questioning everything—why I was doing all this and what was really happening in my life. (Photo: Instagram)

After I came into my husband's life, I felt he slowly learned to express himself. Earlier, he had this mindset where men don’t show pain—he was living in that ‘alpha’ zone. Over the past few years, I’ve repeatedly told him to open up and be vulnerable, because I genuinely like him more when he expresses his emotions. The change has been slow, but it’s happening. He’s always seen himself as the protector and caretaker. Honestly, it’s not easy for men either; they've been conditioned to be that way. But with my husband, I’ve been able to bring that change little by little. I’m happy that he trusts me enough to know that I won’t misuse his vulnerability. It’s a two-way effort—it works only when both people contribute. (Photo: Instagram)

I mean, no matter what people say—public trolling is very common. Of course, people will talk, but that’s okay. I was very clear in my mind that I don’t care about the noise. I know why I chose to marry him. It’s my life, and my decisions come from my own experiences and mindset. Based on everything I’ve been through, I know he is the right person for me. And that’s all that matters. There are so many broken families today, and divorces have become quite common. (Photo: Instagram)

For many people, it’s no longer seen as a taboo, though for some sections of society, that mindset still exists. At the same time, more people are now accepting that if a marriage turns toxic, it’s better for both individuals to part ways rather than continue in an unhealthy relationship. (Photo: Instagram)

I did Bigg Boss in 2018, and by that time I was quite unhappy with my career. I felt I was being typecast—seen only as a pretty face or for comedy—and no one was recognising the actor in me, even after years of work. I knew I had the talent and the skills, but I had already been put into a fixed image. Somewhere, it was also my mistake because I was chasing money and security. That’s actually why I chose to do Bigg Boss—I had asked for a high fee, and my intention wasn’t really to play the game. By then, I had learned that you don’t have to fight every battle. (Photo: Instagram)

The makers saw me as someone strong and outspoken, someone who would fit the show. But for me, it was more about earning money and then taking a break. I wanted to step away for a while because as long as I kept working, I wouldn’t be able to refuse the kind of roles I didn’t want. And until I stopped, people wouldn’t consider me for the kind of work I truly wanted to do. So my plan was simple—do Bigg Boss, earn well, then take a 2–3 year break. That’s why I couldn’t stay on the show for too long. (Photo: Instagram)

There was no pressure at all. For me, it was a conscious choice. I feel the population is already too high, resources are limited, and the cost of living is constantly rising. On top of that, I see a lot of violence and negativity around, and honestly, I’m unhappy with the world we’re living in. Raising a child is a huge responsibility; it involves nurturing and providing the right upbringing, which is difficult, especially given the rising costs of education and other necessities. (Photo: Instagram)

Even though people say both partners will share responsibilities, I feel that a large part of nurturing still falls on women. At that point in my life, I was also trying to rebuild myself professionally. I had taken a break from work by choice, and financially, I didn’t feel ready to take on such a big responsibility. I didn’t want to put that entire burden on my husband either. So, considering all of this, I chose not to have a child. (Photo: Instagram)

It was honestly very tough and painful. The process involves taking hormone injections, which is standard everywhere. The egg retrieval itself isn’t painful during the procedure because you’re sedated, but the pain comes afterward—and it’s quite intense, even worse than period cramps, at least for me. I got it done in 2022. (Photo: Instagram)

The whole process also comes with significant costs. It’s not just the procedure—you also have to pay yearly storage fees to keep the egg freezing. Even though I got it done abroad, in India too it can cost around Rs 3–4 lakhs at a decent clinic. So overall, it’s not an easy journey—physically, emotionally, or financially. (Photo: Instagram)