Being what we want and giving it to people without asking for it: Sister Shivani on love and Relationships

Relationships are an important aspect in our lives, be it between a mother and a child, a husband and a wife, between friends or lovers. At

Times Litfest Delhi

,

Sister Shivani

in conversation with Narayani Ganesh, expresses her idea of relationship as a cause of happiness and respect as opposed to the idea of relationship as a cause of stress and pain.

According to Sister Shivani, it is essential to be selfless in a relationship. The very reason that we enter a relationship with a list of expectations, creates an unhappy and stressful environment. To her it is all about giving love without expecting anything in return. Expectations turns people into someone they are not. It takes away the right to be you.

Sister Shivani goes on to discuss the types of emotions that portray love in different aspects of life. She says, “love is an energy which flows from me to people, but when I am jealous, worry or I am hurt, love gets blocked.” She believes that instead of repeatedly saying ‘I love you’ one to resort to saying ‘I accept you’.

The session also highlights the contradiction between what we speak and what we think. According to Sister Shivani, there are three levels of communication; Thoughts, Behaviour and words. In a relationship, one can hear and see words and behavior. But we cannot witness thoughts. Therefore it becomes crucial that our thoughts are right, even though what we speak may not reflect it. The right thoughts will be delivered eventually.