It was good riddance not only for the LGBTQIA community, but society at large when the Supreme Court struck down Section 377, decriminalising consensual gay sex, in September. Not only did it help many from the LGBTQIA community to come out of the closet, it has since empowered them to follow their instincts. On Karva Chauth, when Hindu women kept a fast praying for the safety and long life of their spouses, many from the LGBTQIA community followed the rituals, for what they felt was the love of their partners. Some made the most of the day — from sunrise to moonrise — praying for the community at large.
Alka and Sonali, a lesbian couple, who has been observing Karva Chauth for nine years now, stirred the hornet’s nest four years back. “We were ridiculed for taking part in a celebration of patriarchy. The community was up in arms against us. But we were not worried about the backlash. This being the first Karva Chauth after the SC verdict, I think more people could openly celebrate the festival,” said Alka. She kept a fast despite being at work all day. “Each day is special in the relationship and we don’t believe in garish celebrations. It’s something we do with a lot of love,” she said. Sonali, who was at home on Saturday, said she too was trying to fast and took fruits to see her through the day. “I prepared food for Alka, so that we could eat together at night,” she told us.
Activist Ranjita Sinha too kept a fast for the well-being of the community. She said even if society is changing, there has not been complete acceptance as yet. “I have been keeping a fast on this day for the past seven years. That time, I was in a relationship with someone else. I couldn’t marry him as his family wouldn’t accept it. But I still remember him on this day. Right now, I am in a relationship with a transman, Srivansh. I celebrate Karva Chauth for him and the entire community. Festivals are meant to bring people together. That’s why I also celebrate Durga Puja every year. Many from our community call me ‘ma’ and to me, they are like my children. I like them to come together on social occasions like these. To me, it’s not an effort to become a
complete woman, but a social celebration,” she said.
Even if the mindsets of people are changing, she said acceptance within the main fold of society is likely to take time. Ranjita’s mooh bola bhai Keaaviiraag Poddar — a transman and a trans priest — is also keeping a fast with her didi. “I am in a relationship for the past nine years. She lives in north Bengal and I am observing a fast for her long life. I want more from the community to come out and follow their instincts. Discrimination of any kind should not come in the way of love,” he said.
As expected, celebrations continued unhindered in Kolkata. Shivangee, who is in a relationship with a transman, said she followed all the rituals for his well-being. “I have Punjabi neighbours and learnt the rituals from them. I woke up at
4 am and there was a sargi that included dry fruits, fruits and sattu ki laddoo. Usually, it’s handed over to the bahu by the mother-in-law or husband. Since my husband stays at a distant place, I organised it myself. I kept a fast and ate dinner after seeing my husband through a sieve and that too on video call,” she said.
Shalini (Jha) Chakraborty, who is in a relationship with Barnika, said this is for the first time that she followed the rituals. “This year, on Bijoya Dashami, Barnika put sindoor on my forehead. That’s why I am celebrating Karva Chauth by observing a vrat. I did not eat since Friday night and took only water on the first half of Saturday,” she said. Reflecting on the changing mood of the society, transgender principal Manabi Bandopadhyay said, “No one needs to be scared of the red eyes of the society. They can be fearless in both life and love. If anyone needs to worry, it’s the society — acceptance in the mainstream is their concern, not ours.”
However, the festival also met with a considerable amount of resistance from within the community. As transwoman Sandeepta Das put it, “This festival reeks of patriarchy. But, it’s a personal choice and I wouldn’t judge anyone for celebrating Karva Chauth.”
Stay updated with the latest news on Times of India. Spread love this holiday season with these New Year wishes, messages, and quotes.
Start a Conversation
Post comment