The lure of the forbidden

Well, here���s a catch. He���s already taken. He has a girlfriend/wife! But wait, do we hear you say, ���so, what���s the big deal?��� After all, if a US survey is anything to go by, women like to target men who are already in a relationship. In other words, taken men are hot property in town!��Researchers at the Oklahoma State Universityhave found that single women are considerably more interested in pursuing a manwho is less available to them. And they have given it a fancy term ��� matepoaching!���Don���t you always hear women fret; ���allthe good men are taken���?��� asks Sriram P, an instructional designer.��According to researchers, a man who is already in a relationship hasproven his ability to commit, run a family, and handle responsibilities. But,what do guys in the city have to say? ���Women don���t want someone whonobody else wants,��� states Krishnan Nambiar, a marine engineer,���And, for many women, men are a trophy ��� eye him if he���sanother girl���s, woo him, win him, and finally, ditch him after he becomesyours.��� Supporting Krishnan, Shyam Sundar, a chartered accountant,sighs, ���I was going steady with my classmate when I realised her friendwas interested in me. And I dumped my girlfriend to be with her friend. But, shelost interest in me within a month. I think ���acquiring��� a man in arelationship is like a big boost to a girl���sego.���However, womenfolk in the city seem to disagree with thistheory. ���I find it extremely sick. And I have no respect for women whomake moves on taken men. It shows that they don���t respect others orthemselves,��� asserts Srishti Mehra, a corporate communication official.��But, many feel that the mate-poaching phenomenon is not new.���Didn���t Shurpanaka desire Rama in spite of knowing that he wasmarried to Sita?��� asks Radhika R, a journalist, ���Don���t we haveinstances in cinema as well? Take Irattai Roja where Khushbhu is hell bent onmarrying Ramki, who already has a wife. Or Sathileelavathi, where Ramesh Arvindand Heera have their own fling when he���s already married to Kalpana. Thereare classic examples in real life as well. Angelina Jolie falling for Brad Pitt,despite him being happily married to Jennifer Aniston, is probably one suchinstance. There are other instances in Kollywood and Bollywood alike ��� thescandalous relationship between Kangana Ranaut and Aditya Pancholi, and SushmitaSen and Vikram Bhatt!���Analysing the mate-poaching phenomenon,Namitha S, a psychologist, says, ���By nature, women want men whom they cantrust and confide in. They crave for a man who can be a loving husband and adoting father. If a man is already associated with another woman for a longterm, the ���other��� woman assumes he has all the characters andvirtues in place. And for them, single men are more of a risk factor.��� Andwhat about men being a prized possession?�����Win-a-man-and-boost-your-ego factor also has a major role in thisphenomenon. But, that doesn���t mean women view men as a ���goodcatch���!��� she laughs in conclusion.Follow us on Twitter for more stories