Child behavior expert says these 5 common phrases parents say to their children can hurt them psychologically

Parenting is never easy, and there’s no doubt about it. There are moments of stress, anger, and exhaustion when parents realise they are emotionally hurting their child. However, sometimes parents unknowingly damage a child’s confidence and emotional well-being by saying some phrases that hurt them psychologically. Highlighting the same parenting problem, child behavior therapist, Dr. Vipul Vithal shared five phrases parents should be mindful about because they may hurt children psychologically.

“Say good morning to uncle…beta say na…” this phrase is one of the most common ones parents often say to their children. And when a child refuses to greet, many parents end up saying “You always embarrass me!” While these comments may come from a place of wanting children to behave well, repeatedly calling them out in public can leave the child feeling publicly humiliated, and over time can make children associate mistakes with the fear of being judged.

Busy parents often ignore their children when they are in the middle of working. Some end up saying: “Can’t you see I’m working” and tell the child to play with their toys instead of bothering them. While parents may genuinely be busy or overwhelmed, consistently dismissing a child’s need for attention can make them feel ignored. When a child’s emotions are repeatedly ignored, they may stop expressing themselves or feel that their feelings do not matter.

Sometimes out of disappointment, parents end up saying hurtful sentences to their children. “You have made our life hell” or “Everyone is unhappy because of you,”: Even if these sentences come out during moments of frustration, they can deeply affect a child’s emotional development. When a child repeatedly hears such phrases, they feel emotionally blackmailed and begin to see themselves as a burden.

Many parents compare their children with siblings, classmates, or other children, thinking it will motivate them. Phrases like, “Look at others, have you seen how they do it?” may seem like encouragement, but the expert say they can often make children feel rejected rather than motivated.
Constant comparisons can affect a child’s confidence and make them believe they are not good enough. Encouraging their individual progress is a healthier way to build self-esteem.

Another habit experts warn against is making children feel that love depends on their behaviour or achievements. Statements like, “Finish your homework first, then come to me” or “You keep bothering me all day” can make children feel emotionally pushed away.Children need boundaries, but they also need reassurance that they are loved. Correcting a child’s behaviour while maintaining warmth and connection helps them feel safe and supported.