The Art of Parenting: Has parenting become difficult? Expert shares tips for successful parenting

Parenting is a tough task. The difficulty level is increasing day-by-day, but it is not because children have changed. The reason behind this is that the world around them has changed faster than they are prepared. Home is not the only ground today. Children are growing up on screen and social media. Constant comparison and peer pressure is often unnoticed.

Parents are trying their best. They are focusing on marks, discipline and behaviour. But they are missing the most important part, that is Children’s mindset.

Sometimes, being perfect on paper is not the reality. Some students, who are performing well on academics, good in discipline, often say: “I am tired. I feel like I am never enough.” This statement is directly linked with mindset and mental well-being problems. Parenting needs to evolve at this point.

Belief and self confidence

In the race of marksheet perfection, we are raising fearful achievers. We have to stop this. Rather than raising fearful achievers, we should try to make them confident thinkers. Fear and pressure can result in better marks sometimes, but not confidence. We must have to think that marks can always be rebuilt, but once broken, confidence can take years to recover.

Here comes the role of communication. The way parents communicate plays a powerful role. Always showing concern regarding results and marks can make them unconfident. Continuously saying that your child is not focused or good enough can internalize this thought in their minds. Parenting is not only raising a child physically. Parents actually shape their voices inside their minds. Choose encouraging and empowering language instead of criticism.

Failure is not a stigma

We must have changed our mindset to see failures. If children have fear of failure, they will stop trying. This will result in stagnation of growth. Don’t ask, ‘Why did you fail?’ The better question is, ‘What did you learn?’ This small shift can remove feelings of shame and fear. Appreciate efforts, not results.

Make an emotional connection

Don’t be in a rush to correct behaviour. In this rush, many parents forget to connect emotionally with their child. A child who feels judged will shut down. Rather than judging a child, make them feel understood. Before correcting behaviour, it is important to connect emotionally. Discipline without connection created distance, more than improvement. Ms Sharani Ponguru states Children learn more from examples than words. If parents panic under pressure, children learn anxiety. If parents stay calm and composed, children learn strength and resilience naturally.

Also, it is important to recognize the environment far beyond the home. They are constantly exposed to reels and comparison. They need validation. Children growing up in a negative mental environment, no motivation can make a lasting impact. Always monitor what a child is consuming, be it content, conversations and influences. This monitoring is an essential part of parenting.

Parenting is not only about discipline. It is about building emotional strength. The path of life is not always going to be easy. They will have to face rejection, pressure and failure. Parents cannot protect them from realities, but can prepare them to handle it. Children will not remember how many times they were corrected. They will remember how they felt.Parenting is a tough task. The difficulty level is increasing day-by-day, but it is not because children have changed. The reason behind this is that the world around them has changed faster than they are prepared. Home is not the only ground today. Children are growing up on screen and social media. Constant comparison and peer pressure is often unnoticed.

In this changing environment, parents are trying their best. They are focusing on marks, discipline and behaviour. But they are missing the most important part, that is Children’s mindset.

Sometimes, being perfect on paper is not the reality. Some students, who are performing well on academics, good in discipline, often say: “I am tired. I feel like I am never enough.” This statement is directly linked with mindset and mental well-being problems. Parenting needs to evolve at this point.

Belief and self confidence

In the race of marksheet perfection, we are raising fearful achievers. We have to stop this. Rather than raising fearful achievers, we should try to make them confident thinkers. Fear and pressure can result in better marks sometimes, but not confidence. We must have to think that marks can always be rebuilt, but once broken, confidence can take years to recover.

Here comes the role of communication. The way parents communicate plays a powerful role. Always showing concern regarding results and marks can make them unconfident. Continuously saying that your child is not focused or good enough can internalize this thought in their minds. Parenting is not only raising a child physically. Parents actually shape their voices inside their minds. Choose encouraging and empowering language instead of criticism.

Parenting is not only about discipline. It is about building emotional strength. The path of life is not always going to be easy. They will have to face rejection, pressure and failure. Parents cannot protect them from realities, but can prepare them to handle it. Children will not remember how many times they were corrected. They will remember how they felt.


Sharani Ponguru, a transformational coach and certified ICF Coach