6 tiny parenting habits that build trust instead of fear

As children grow, they want their parents to trust them more, support them in right decisions, and teach them the right ways to lead a better life. Often kids have a tendency to do the opposite of what is told to them; this happens mostly because, when they might have needed your expertise the most, you might have scolded them for something entirely out of context. If your children trust you to come upto you with their problems and aspirations, it is your duty to duly respect them and help them out in any way you can. Now, fear shouldn’t be the driver of your children; it should always be your love and trust that should guide them. They should be able to come to you in times of despair, be able to make suggestions and ask you anything they want.
Let us take a look into six habits that build trust instead of fear.

Don’t think they don’t have a brain of their own? Well, try and trust your own kids. There might be a difference in the way you and your kids perceive things; how you see the world and how they do might be because you are more experienced, but they have a brain of their own. Even if they are making mistakes, let them learn from their own mistakes. But if they fall, be right behind them to catch hold of them; that is when they will need you the most. Instilling fear in them, instead of supporting them, will only make them not trust you enough to tell you things further.

If you will not expect it from your kids, who will you expect it from? The most asked question by parents is, What should I do? expectations should be balanced with trust. Know that your child will do anything in their power to live upto your expectations. You cannot force your kids to do what you couldn’t do once. They have the liberty to live their own lives; your role is to support their dreams, own them like they are your own. Even if they fail to meet your expectations, don’t get angry; encourage them to not lose their hopes for the future.

Severe punishments are likely to discourage honesty. You have the right to scold your own kids if they are wrong but for everything? NO! This will make them hide things from you in the future to avoid getting punishments; lying follows just after. Nobody would want their kids to lie. The only thing that can be done in this scenario is to let them make choices; if they end up doing the wrong things, scold them but let them try. Focus on gentle guidance and appropriate consequences that teach them rather than scare them.

Listen to what your child wants to say; don’t criticize them. Every child has their own voice and that needs to be heard. If you are one to criticize them, it will only make them rebel more against you. Every individual is different; their likes and dislikes are different. It is crucial to give your children a safe space where they feel valued and respected.

Actions speak louder than words. When you model kindness and honesty and practice patience, children are more likely to absorb these values. Ultimately, the best way to shape a child’s character is to embody the qualities you wish to see in them. Instead of scolding them, make them a better person by teaching them that life is a lesson; it needs to be learned like that. Your example is their greatest lesson.

Parenting is not about commanding, it is more about guiding. Your kids need to learn from you that teamwork is all about cooperation. Whether you are solving any family problem, setting different household rules, include them, this will make them come to you without fear. With the hope that there is no better mentor than you for them.