Dreaming about sex? This is what it tells about your psychology

We often see ourselves having sex with our ex, with someone we can’t stand the sight of, someone who’s family or someone of the same sex; in our dreams, that is. Sometimes, we awake aroused, while the other times, we simply want to get up, brush our teeth, take a bath and forget the dream as soon as we can. But, what do these dreams actually signify? It is said that sex dreams are actually never about sex, per se, but some aspects of our own personality. They are also not about the people who come in the dreams but about what they represent in your life. Here we look into various kinds of sex dreams that you see and what they actually signify as your subconscious can be a very tricky devil.

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Sex with a stranger: There’s a theory by Carl Jung that says that every person has an animus or an anima. Animus refers to the male energy that every female has and anima refers to the female energy that every male has. Whenever you imagine yourself having sex with someone you don’t know and is of the opposite sex, you need to remember the condition of that person. He is symbolic of the animus or anima energy within you. Let’s say, you are a female and you see that you are having sex with a stranger who is meek. This means that the masculine aspects of your personality are weak and you need to work on them. However, if it is a strong and a bold man that you see, it means that your personality is in the right balance of male and female energies and the dream is, hence, a sign of growth for you.

Sex with a faceless stranger: Sex with a faceless stranger is not about you waiting for someone right in your life you don’t know yet. It is simply about you trying to understand a strange facet of your life. It could mean that you want to be more controlling and assertive in your life.

Getting raped: Dreams of a rape are very scary and can lead to cold sweats and waking up in the middle of the night. Here, we are talking about those who have not been a victim of rape or assault in the real life. These kinds of dreams are basically a manifestation of a sense of powerlessness that you have over things that are going on in your life. It could be pressure at work, bringing up a baby you didn’t want to have, dealing with social or familial pressure or the likes. Rape dreams symbolize fear, humiliation, frustration and powerlessness.

However, if you have been a victim of rape in your life and see such dreams, you must seek help as such dreams could mean more serious damage to your mental health.

Sex with an ex: If you dream of having sex with an ex lover of yours, it does not mean that you still have leftover emotions for him, something that most of us misinterpret it as. Dreams involving your ex are, in fact, the most common type of sex dreams that people see. Dreaming about your ex simply means that you are missing what that person represented and not the person himself. We often also compare our current relationship with our previous ones, seeking what we had in the past. Such dreams only symbolize this desire. It simply means that you need to add a spark or revitalize your current relationship and add the qualities of your previous relationship to it that you find missing in your life at present.

Also, understand the nature of the sexual experience that you have with your ex and how you feel during that experience. This will help you bring finishing touches to any leftover feelings that you have for your previous relationship or partner.

Incest: Just like rape, if you have had a real-life experience of incest that you haven’t been able to shake off, you must seek medical help. Otherwise, dreams about incestuous sex do not signify anything so horrendous.

If you dream of having sex with a parent, it symbolizes maturity or becoming a parent yourself. If you dream of having sex with a sibling, it means that you desire to be closer to them. It could also symbolize anything related to forgiveness or acceptance.

Sex with someone of the same gender: If you are not a homosexual or a bisexual in your waking life, dreaming of having sex with someone of the same gender could simply mean that you are emulating the person you are having sex with. Let’s say, you dream of having sex with a close friend of yours. It doesn’t mean that you harbour any such feelings for her. Instead, try to think of any feelings that you have liked in her lately, if she is very bold, creative or outgoing. It simply means that you want to have those qualities yourself.

There’s a rule that you can follow here, called the rule of three by psychologist Lauri Loewenberg. This means that think of the first three things that come to your mind when you think of that person. These three things can be your key to understanding what your dream symbolizes as these three may be qualities you want in your own life.

Cheating or being cheated on: It is highly unlikely that this is happening in your real life, so loosen up. It simply reflects on some residual issues that you have left over in your relationship. If you are the one cheating on your partner, it could mean that you are guilty of something. If you are being cheated on by your partner, it could reflect on some insecurity issues that you have in your relationship.

Having sex with Bradley Cooper or Benedict Cumberbatch in your dreams can be super fun. But what do they actually symbolize? Two things precisely: Either you really want to have sex with them or you want the qualities they stand for (rule of three, again), like fame, glamour, or power.

The idea of participating in an orgy may excite you and it may have happened in your dream already. However, this isn’t something you would want to dream because it doesn’t reflect very positively on your current life. It means that you are overburdened, overworked and dealing with a lot many things at the same time. It could mean you have too much to accomplish and that your attention is divided. Simplify your life and slow down a bit.

At a particular location: Here, the dream isn’t about the person you are having sex with but having sex at a particular location. Let’s say, you dream of having sex with someone in an office setting, it could mean that you are too preoccupied with your work these days. If you dream of having sex with someone in a particular place from the past, let’s say your previous apartment, ask yourself what that place means to you. What kind of a person were you when you were living there? Are you longing to become that again? These should help you understand why you have such dreams.

About a mind blowing orgasm: This one is simple and could mean two things: An exciting end to something or craving for a really fun sex in real life.