Greed versus a few good men

Is Munish Dayal (Nisha Sharma's spurned groom) a rarity among today's upwardly mobile young men? Not really. There are many who cite tradition as defence. "It's okay as a ritual but not as a means of satisfying greed," argues Bhanu Pratap, a Lucknow-based marketing executive. "Some accept it as compensation when the bride is either not up to the mark or when her parents want to ensure her comfort at her in-laws' home." Chennai's Anand J, a professor in a business school, argues: "Dowry is traditionally considered a security blanket that can help the girl if something goes wrong.I would not demand it but if it comes, I will not say no." Ajay Singh (name changed), an IRS officer from Patna has no qualms about declaring: "Why shouldn't I take dowry? My late father paid Rs 10 lakh to get my sister married and I have two more sisters to marry off." But there are many more who do not subscribe to the view. Says S Jacob, an M Com student from Chennai: "In our community, dowry is a prestige issue for the bride's parents who feel their daughter will not get any respect otherwise. But I'll insist that no dowry is accepted." Delhi doctor Swapan Debroy insists, "I won't even accept furniture from her father. I want us to build a home together where we buy our things with our own money." Suranjan Rao, a law student from Bangalore, is willing to disown his family if they broach the topic of dowry. For Bangalore tax consultant Rishikesh Reddy it's not dowry but the girl's character that matters more. Mumbai lawyer Suneet Joshi, who's getting married soon says, "I would not dream of asking for an almirah or a Santro or whatever else it is that grooms are supposed to ask for." Delhi-based architect Shresth Nagpal says, 'If one is clear about their principles they can convince others about it — I know I can and I will."