Sexed Up Stories

Just about everything is being strenuously "sexed-up" by spin doctors. Look at George W Bush — he''s all "sexed up" with nowhere to go. Watching him bumble his way through a recent press conference (past the grisly Odai-Qusai killings), my heart went out to the man called "the most powerful person in the world".
Says a lot about power and the world''s condition.Bush conducted the conference with customary jauntiness, replete with expected and amusing Bushisms that left the journos baffled. But that''s Dubya for you — a one-man WMD.
But it isn''t Bush and his minders alone who''re busy "sexing up" the scenario. Everybody and anybody with an agenda seems to be at it. And one can thank the Brits for coming up with yet another catchy coinage. With so many classified sexed-up reports floating around, who needs Liz Hurley? Or David Beckham? Unfortunately, in the sad-bad case of Kelly, the "sexing up" went a tad too far. One scientist dead. And enough egg on everybody''s faces to ensure an omelette-shortage in Britain for some time to come.
Closer home, we have so many yummy issues that could do with some heavy-duty "sexing up". Going by recent headlines, it''s the Kumbh Mela at Nashik that''s got the electronic media all gung-ho (the mighty Godavari is doing its thing to keep the action hot and moving). Then, of course, if you are a Prannoy Roy fan, then you believe him when he says the biggest story of the day involves some kid in Lucknow who has argued her own case in court and set the ball in motion against TV shows that denigrate women (read all those saas-bahu superhit weepies on a rival channel). That''s what I call a neat "sexing up" job.
"Sexed up" media reports have ghastliest implications and repercussions. Tony Blair''s shoulders have shrunk visibly since Kelly''s suicide. His ratings have followed suit. No amount of sexing up is going to salvage Bush''s poodle. And don''t be surprised if Blair''s remaining hair does the disappearing act, along with popular support.
Meanwhile, what does one make of this statement: We''re on a hot and we''re gonna stay on a hot. Only Bush could roll out something as country-hick sounding and get away with it. While he''s "on a hot" perhaps he''ll hunt down a few more offspring of leaders-on-the-run and have his "folks" riddle them with bullets, while millions of viewers, revolted by the macabre sight, turn their faces away from grisly TV images. No extra "sexing up" required here, thank you very much. This was orgiastic enough.
We, in India have been "sexing up" stuff for centuries, except that we didn''t know that''s what it was called. We are so good at it in fact, that we could sell our expertise to other needy nations. Look at our CBI''s handling of Babri Masjid. Look at anything, everything. How "kewl" are we? And we don''t even know it.
If you ask me, the person who truly deserved to be sexed up before he said "see you around folks" and went back into Bushland, was former US ambassador to India, Robert Blackwill. One thing''s for sure, that man talked and walked the talk — something to do with his days as a Harley Davidson easy rider, perhaps? Blackwill talked tough and he talked sense. He took a stand when he had to (elections in Kashmir) and shut up the rest of the time. His parting shot may have been somewhat ominous (terrorists to strike at the heart of India), but we ignore it at our own peril.
Meanwhile, the most sexed-up story of all, has to be the tiny Pakistani "ambassador" Noor who came here to fix a heart and succeeded in breaking quite a few herself. I would put Noor''s image on postal stamps issues on both sides of the border. What better symbol for a friendlier future between warring nations than a darling little girl who made us see the futility of our ongoing conflict Dil Se?