I’m not suited for one marriage: Lucky Ali

Singer, part-time actor, part-time environmentalist and full-time philosophercall him whatyou may, but his beliefs and comments, laced with his typically reflectiveobservations, make for a fascinating study.Be it his neatly balancedrelationships with his two wives, his music, his caustic views on the media orhis deep concern for the environment, Lucky dances to his owntunes.We are in his farm, a one-hour drive from Bangalore city,surrounded by acres of green when he walks in dressed in pyjamas and an orangesweat shirt over a grey tee, those famous curls, now all salt and pepper. Hishazel eyes are hidden behind dark aviators. “I have puffy eyes,” hesays. He reluctantly removes the aviators and settles down on a stonebench.Over some kadak chai and toast, his “comfortfood”, he ponders on a life lessordinary.Once again, it’s music that has brought Lucky out ofnear seclusion. After a five-year hiatus, he’s released‘Xsuie’. “It means ‘at your own pace’,” heexplains. He is excited about the online distribution of his album. “Iwanted to do away with physical distribution.Imagine the plasticthat you will be using, the paper that you will waste for making CDs. Moreover,an online release frees me up from numerous hassles associated with tying upwith music companies. Also, it helps me interact with my fans directly,”he tells us.A quick glance at his career reveals that the albumcouldn’t have been more aptly named. “My brother once said,‘In life you should paddle slowly.’ I didn’t understand it atthat time. But it stuck with me. And I have been living life at my own pace. Thepoint is you should paddle slowly but never miss the bus,” hesmiles.It’s not hard to see why. He’s been an actor(debuted at 44), a singer, a carpet-cleaner, oil-rigger, horse-breeder, organicfarmer, playback singer and a father of four children and the husband of twowomen... the many identities which bring us then to the point of hisrelationships.Lucky says he met Meaghan Jane McCleary, a native ofNew Zealand and a pastor’s daughter, when he went to YMCA in Delhi alongwith his brother “Macky.” He was helping him with the door when hesaw a pretty girl smile at him. “My brother says `hi’ to everyone.Soon he got talking to Meaghan. Then I joined them.We began meetingregularly and became friends. She went back to New Zealand. That’s when mybrother said, ‘She is a good girl.You should marry her.’When Meaghan returned to India I felt she liked me too. She came to India on aWednesday, I proposed on a Thursday and we married on a Friday,” henarrates the love story. Today they have two children, Ta’awwuz, 14, andTasmia, 13.Lucky says he did have a strange intuition about hismarital life. “I always knew I’d have more than one wife. In fact Idid tell Meaghan about it when we got married. She thought I was joking.”But he was not. Four years after his first marriage, he marriedagain.This time to a Parsi girl called Anahita. Today, known as Inaya, a filmmaker and photographer, she’s lives in Mumbai with Lucky’s other two children Sara and Raiyan.An SMS interruptsthe conversation. He checks it stealthily, but can’t hide his smile.“Inaya is such a funny girl,” he says. The SMS is fromher.The conversation continues, only to be interrupted by along-distance phone call. It’s Meaghan. Lucky is making travel plans. Hewill be flying out to New Zealand to bring his wife and two children back toIndia. “We have decided to home-school our children,” hesays.What does love mean to him? “Oh,loveit’severything. The Creator loved us so much, he made this world forusplants,animals.” Okay,let’s get specific.What about love between man and woman (orwomen)? Without missing a beat he says, “Marriage.” Huh?“Marriage, that’s it,” he reiterates. “Nothing beyondthat.In my space, in the faith I follow, I have the permission tomarry four times. But Allah also says if you feel you cannot deal with themequitably then marry one.”Does that mean you can love morethan one woman at the same time?“Yes. I think I can love morethan two people with the same intensity. My strength comes from the women I ammarried to. They are a part of my spiritual make-up.” Does his wivesunderstand that? “I think they do.A woman does not really havea problem if her husband marries again as long as she knows that he lovesher.And I love my wives.” He explains further, “It isnot physical. It is something spiritual. It’s about children, growth, making a world, a life, somethingabout..” hegrapples for the right words.Then he cuts it short with a.. “It’s not about what you irresponsible journalists think it is.I’m sorry,” he apologises. “Would you like your husband tocome back home and lie to you?” he asks.No. But few womenwould want their husbands to come back and say they’re marryingagain.He ignores and continues, “What would be harder? Yourtrust would break and you would do something wrong. For what? Some men are builta particular way.Some are suited for one marriage. I don’tthink I am suited for one marriage. I move around a lot. I am a free spirit. Iget lonely. I cannot cheat. What happens when you are faced with temptations?It’s better to marry. Be honest to your wife and love yourwives.”But how did Meaghan take it when she was told about hissecond marriage? “Like a martyr. It’s such a hard hit for awoman,” he says.“I never knew I was going to get married to Inaya. Iwas spending a lot of time in India. I was lonely and needed to be with someone.It happened over a period of time.Inaya spoke to Meaghan. And shesaid, ‘Go with Allah’s steps’. I have learnt so many thingsabout life from my wives,” he says. How does he manage the balancing act?“They taught me about love and relationships. I am such a Jahil. And Ihave all these beautiful people in my life.”Does your entirefamily live under the same roof? “The children connect with each other.But for women....it is sensitive na? Yes, we celebrate festivalstogether.Earlier we all lived in the farm. Inaya and the childrenlived with my dad in his house, while Meghan and the children lived here withme. This is Meghan’s house,” he points out to a squat structure infront. The farm has many individual houses occupied by members of the Alifamily.Apparently, Mehmood had warned Inaya about him. “Hesaid to her, be careful. He might just take a thirdwife.”Lucky Ali’s life, in his own words is“Out-of-the-box”. He just wants to live his life - truthfully. Truthas he knows it. “All my life I have lived in a family where two marriageswas the norm. My father had two wives and so did my uncles. There was my mom andTracy mom.There was badi chachi and chotti chachi. And there waslove. All the children grew up together with lots of love.” Then he askspointedly, “Why do you journalists have to write about all this? There aremore important issues you need to write instead of a jerk singing O Sanam andmarrying twice.”Agreed, but this facet of his life isintriguing to say the least. “I am not going to apologize for who Iam,” he says. “Talk about the issues that worry the world. You arenot thinking about deforestation; our ground water is depleting; I am worriedabout how this Earth is going to be for our children.”He isnot kite-flying. Lucky has spent time with farmers as part of a project withOXFAM. He is also passionate about education of children and works towardseducating the underprivileged.Currently, what is consuming him isM-Spot, a 24/7 music room that will be streamed live, online. The studio isbeing set up in his house. “Here those who are interested in music, canjam.There will be artists from our own Lucky Ali Enterprise, andartists from abroad who will come and jam here.Fans can see what weare up to and interact with us live. There’s going to be a radio station,on line space and live music room. The future is exciting,” hesays.As we mentioned, for Lucky Ali life is just a journey thatpaddles slowly and surely.Follow us on Twitter for more stories