I am a cockroach: Tillotama

Having played a character inspired by Medha Patkar in Choli Ke Peeche, Tillotama Shome says she is happy to have quit films post the critical acclaim of Monsoon Wedding and Shadows of Time to teach drama therapy in a New York prison and eventually return to India to be the actor that she is today
After having done Monsoon Wedding and Shadows of Time, why did you give up your movie career and go to study in the US?
My friends had told me that it���������s suicidal to leave Mumbai after having done Monsoon Wedding. What if I never got work when I completed my studies and decided to return? But I wanted to learn and was ready to fall flat on my face. I went to study theatre in New York and specialised in drama therapy. After completing my second Masters, I took up work in Rikers Island ��������� one of America���������s high security prisons. There I used drama therapy to help inmates come to terms with their lives. The job paid me well enough to want to stay on. But when I got a challenging role in The Waiting City, I quit and returned. The day I decided to be an actor, I told myself that I���������d have to deal with not knowing what my future will be. I was only accountable to myself. After returning to acting, I���������ve already done films like Boond, Clap Clap and Turning 30, among others.
After playing a nun with Radha Mitchell in The Waiting City, you���������ve played a seductress in Owais Husain���������s untitled project. How did you avoid being stereotyped?
After watching me in MW and SOT, people felt that I was good at playing shy and traditional characters, who weren���������t verbose. But once I returned from the US, I found myself being cast in roles that belonged to various settings. In Prakash Jha���������s production, Turning 30, I play an urban girl. In Owais��������� film, Santosh Sivan shot me as a seductress from Punjab! In Clap Clap, I���������ve played a gangster���������s girlfriend. Thankfully in the West, I have not been given parts of a taxi driver���������s girlfriend or a terrorist. Italo recently said that I am an actor who can fit in both Indian and European contexts.
And now, you���������ve played a role in Italo Spinelli���������s Choli Ke Peeche that���������s been inspired by Medha Patkar...
My role is based on a slightly younger Medha Patkar. I haven���������t met Medha Patkar but I���������ve tried to imbibe her spirit. The basic ethos is to be happy dying for a cause. Even though my character is based on Medha Patkar and I had watched her extensively in documentaries made by Italo and others, in the context of the film my character���������s struggle comes very close to what Mahasweta Devi has been fighting for. Meeting Mahasweta Devi was an incredible experience. I remember she was once asked how she was doing and her reply was: ���������I am always fine!��������� I was moved by this statement. While trying to comb her hair, she could not reach the back of her head. When I offered to help, she emphatically said: ���������No, don���������t help me!��������� That was yet another slogan of her fearlessness. I am in love with Mahasweta Devi���������s strength and beauty. Working in this film has reaffirmed my desire to continue my work as an actor, who is fearless of judgement and keeps her eyes firmly on being part of films that challenge the inertia. I���������ll soon be in Mumbai to rehearse for Rehaan Engineer���������s Hedda Gabler. After that, I leave for London to film Joy of the City, where I play a Goan girl, who goes to London and encounters a bunch of misfits.
Any offers from Mira Nair?
Mira is a friend. I know she will cast me when she gets the right role. She has been a great fighter. We���������ve all been through such struggles. I am a cockroach and just like the cockroach who survived the holocaust, I���������ve survived a lot in life.
Do you see yourself doing Bollywood movies?
Bollywood has changed and gone beyond song and dance. MW opened new doors for independent film-making. I���������d want to work with the likes of Shimit Ameen, Navdeep Singh, Anurag Kashyap, Dibakar Banerjee and Vishal Bhardwaj. In Bengal, I���������ve loved the sensibilities of Suman Mukhopadhyay, Anjan Dutt and Shrijit.