How Dare You?

It’s surreal. A 32-year-old woman is, allegedly, gang-raped by four of her husband’s friends. She survives the horror and confides in her husband, and together they decide to seek the help of law to bring the alleged perpetrators of the heinous crime to the book. The result? The victim ends up being asked “...who gave you the greatest pleasure...” Humiliated, she decides to drop the case. And since then, they’ve been living a life of shame, in exile, in constant fear for their lives, the couple claim.

Cut to 2016. the victim, emboldened by a TV show on gang rape and the gross injustice victims suffer, decides to speak out once again. And history repeats itself. There is more horror awaiting her —she is accused of lying, of making the whole ‘story’ up, of extortion, of cheating. Her identity is revealed; her agony becomes fodder for public consumption; her rape becomes a tool for political score-settling.

While the jury is out on the allegations levelled by both the victim and the accused, the average Malayali woman watches in horror. This could be her story. Or her daughter’s, sister’s, friend’s.

What’s worse, she wonders, getting raped once? Or being violated again and again, in the name of interrogation by crude, insensitive protectors of law?
What’s easier, she asks — reliving the mental trauma silently and trying to move on? Or speaking out, at the risk of being slut-shamed by society?
It’s a hopeless debate really, she concludes, seething at the skewed system where a victim is twice punished -- at the hands of the criminal and at the hands of society.
Trivandrum Times listens in as women vent out their anger, frustration, helplessness, and through it all, demand for justice.


No hope for women in Kerala; I’d rather turn to social media than to cops
“I would imagine that being raped is the worst thing that can happen to a woman. But after this case, I am beginning to think that the real torture only begins once you try to seek justice,” says Praseeda K, a homemaker, who admits to have lost faith in the system. “It’s frightening that even after the incident got exposed and received much attention nationally, no one is even speaking about justice for the victim. It seems like right from the word go, the police were trying to aid the perpetrators of the crime. God forbid I was in such a situation, I would rather use social media than approach the police,” she adds.


Why should a woman have to prove her ‘innocence’ in a rape case?

Minu Pauline

, an entrepreneur who is “shocked” by the way this case is being played out, says, “I’m someone who keeps travelling at all times of the day and night. My work is such that I drive home at 2 am sometimes. If something happens to me during the time, will I be questioned ‘what were you doing outside your house at 2 am?’ And will I then have to prove my ‘innocence’? And exactly how do they expect us to gather this proof? This whole thing is so scary.”


It's so skewed that the scars of rape may fade, but the stigma won't
What kind of a society have we built for our women, asks Smitha Sony, a professional and a mother of a teenage daughter. “What kind of a world is this, where a woman not only has to bear the brunt of a heinous crime like rape and suffer at the hands of the perpetrator, but then suffer at the hands of the police and society as well? It’s appalling that the victims have to remain in the shadows for the rest of their lives, as if they have done something wrong. The stigma is such that a woman is scared to report the crime. After all, what’s this case proving? That no result will come of it except that your life will be ruined thanks to constant scrutiny from society. How will any girl speak up about any sexual crime after this?”


But, keeping quiet is not an option either
Milli Pavithran, a homemaker says that we have to teach our women that keeping quiet is not an option. “I tell my teenage daughter not to bother about what other people think. I teach her to react strongly even to the smallest instance of molestation. There might be policemen who are inefficient and insensitive but that should never be a deterrent. I will take it to wherever it needs to be taken, until I get justice.”


Police turn self-appointed judges: Dr

J Devika

, activist
All the notorious rape cases in our State are testimony to police apathy. And mind you, the

Kerala Police

are very efficient when it comes to robberies and other cases. It’s only when it comes to rape and molestation that they turn self-appointed judges. Also, the police and Govt servants act as if they are superior and people shiver to approach them, even today. In reality they are accountable to us. No amount of orientation is enough to change their attitude towards women.

My fight is against the police: Parvathy T, film and theatre actor
I have done my best to expose the procedure error from the part of the police by bringing the Thrissur gang rape case to the public domain. So my fight is against the police. I won’t give up, regardless of who stands with me. The police have hushed up this case without following the proper protocol. And we have the right to expose that lapse with the media in such cases.

We need to create that world where women can be fearless: Jwala Gutta, badminton ace
We are not yet ready as a society to accept a rape victim, even an alleged rape victim, without damaging prejudices. As a society, we collectively need to address certain things immediately, who or what are we trying to protect? A victim of violence or concepts of honour? Until we begin there, women will continue to be shamed for coming out and speaking about violence they face. They will continue to live in fear and not report crimes. And all the laws that we have in place are irrelevant if we don’t create that kind of a protective environment for the victims. Judgement is the main culprit, and people like us need to start questioning it ourselves. What is this reputation that is at stake? Why is it that we look at girls who speak out in a tainted light? We need to individually and collectively figure out these answers to create that world where women can be fearless.


The victim has to hide her face, while the accused is undaunted: AK Sajan, filmmaker
My film Puthiya Niyamam was based on a real-life incident which never got publicised. The victim wanted anonymity because of the way the society treats such a person, with a mixture of sympathy and a lot of other things. Police and the court are just reflections of a society which want the victim and their family to be punished for the rest of their lives. Think of the current case, for example, the victims were desperate to cover their faces while the accused has become a hero of sorts, declaring his version with pride, without any attempt to hide his identity. People will now start looking for the photo and phone number of the victim and she will be forced to leave for good. For this reason, more cases go unreported in Kerala.


Male bastion in police should be broken: Prasanth Nair. Kozhikode District Collector
If a workplace is an all-male bastion, it will develop certain characteristics. Police stations have been male bastions since forever. With more inclusion of police women, the character of the police is changing. In the presence of women, the male police will speak more politely. Things are much better now but there is scope for improvement.
It’s indisputable that the administration needs to be more sensitive. Sensitisation and training is being held for that, but they are not being imbibed fully. The police interact more with criminals and so a detox is routinely needed. We also need a larger number of women in the police force and sensitisation at all levels.



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