Girls in great demand for adoption in Delhi

NEW DELHI: Delhi may be a worried city burdened with a skewed sex ratio. A city that sees thousands of children abandoned every year. But over the decade, the city has developed a beautiful trend that has given a whole new meaning to adoption. Increasing adoptions and opting for baby girls are part of this emerging trend.
Ten years back, all centres for homeless children in the city had a three-year waiting period for a male child.Counsellors at the centres had quite a job trying to convince childless couples to opt for baby girls.
The waiting lists are still there. Only now, there’s one for the girl child as well. And if adoption figures are anything to go by, a speedy judicial system and smoother adoption procedures can ensure that not one child in the city is left homeless.
‘‘Earlier, we had to plead with couples to take girls. Now we have 80-90 couples waiting for baby girls,’’ said honorary general secretary of Delhi Council for Child Welfare A V Kumar. The organisation runs a children’s home, Palna.
Palna has seen 600 adoptions from Delhi in the past one year, of which 50 per cent were local. Clearly, the demand for children is very high. And about 65 per cent of the children adopted were girls. The Central Adoption Research Agency (CARA) has cleared 225 domestic adoptions, while 212 children from Delhi found homes abroad.
These days many homes are urging childless couples to adopt girls with the one-liner: ‘Take home a female child, take home emotional security’. ‘‘There has been a definitive change in the attitude of couples in the last seven years,’’ said Vijay Raina of Udayan. ‘‘First, there’s less stigma attached to adoption. Also, with more families going nuclear, there are fewer people involved in the decision-making process and couples can make up their minds fast,’’ she said.
Children with special needs, however, still struggle to get homes in the city. ‘‘We try to locate local homes, so that the child easily blends into the family,’’ said Kumar. ‘‘But families here are still reluctant to pick up children with disabilities or major illnesses. That’s because majority of foster families are from the middle-class. Rearing special children can be very expensive. Our health care system is not of much help as there are fewer facilities for special children and there is no insurance cover for adopted children. But hopefully the trend will change,’’ she said.
However, the good news is that while the number of foreign adoptions have remained steady over the years, many more children are finding homes in India too, according to CARA director S K Devburman.
Agreeing, Delhi state child welfare department official Nisha Aggarwal said, ‘‘If the waiting period for boys is 18 months, the waiting for girls is one year.’’
Trendsetters: If adopting girls is the latest trend, its right time for single parents also. The city has seen a rising number of single women, and men adopting children. ‘‘There’s no law that bars such an adoption, but we have to be extra careful,’’ said Kumar. ‘‘Usually, we prefer the parent to be 30-35 years old, emotionally and financially stable and having full family support. We need to know how the parent will behave if her or she decides to find a partner as well as a contingency plan in case of the parent’s death,’’ she said.
Why we adopt: According to Raina, nearly 99 per cent couples adopt to fill in a void — to fulfil a need. But one per cent couples also adopt children to work out their marriages. ‘‘It is essential to know the motive of adoption to ensure that children get better homes when they leave ours,’’ said Raina.
‘‘Couples should adopt children only when they are needed. They should fill the void in our lives and complete the family. We don’t want them to be adopted out of a sense of charity,’’ Kumar said.
Are you the right choice?: Adoption agencies and homes spend months and several counselling sessions to gauge just this. Besides financial security and a supportive family background, houses of prospective parents are also scrutinised. The couples also have to provide exigency plan in case of any eventuality. Till up to five years after the adoption, regular updates on the child are mandatory.