Same-sex marriage: Disappointed by verdict, plans put off

NEW DELHI: Andy and Faraz, both 38 years old, have been in a live-in relationship for nearly seven years and were heartbroken on Tuesday when the Supreme Court declined to legitimise same-sex marriage. They had drawn up elaborate plans to get married, purchase property together and adopt a child.

"Our expectations were not met. We still have a long battle ahead," said a crestfallen Andy, who works in an MNC."We are not keen to adopt a child now, but we want to raise a kid in the future. We will seek out more couples and ask them to pressure the government on our rights," he added.
For most couples, Tuesday's court verdict appeared a decade-long 'waste of time'. They said they were back to square one. Neelabh Kumar despaired that a committee to consider the rights of same-sex couples, as recommended by the court, would take another 10 years. "What a waste of everyone's time," he sighed. "For all the big words of the verdict, basically nothing has changed. But I think we got used to this kind of humiliation since the legalisation of same-sex relations was equally a joke from 2008 to 2018. India had a golden opportunity to be a progressive leader among Asian nations. But we were expecting a bit much, weren't we?"
PhD student Abhishek Dey, 28, and advocate Suraj Tomar had marriage in mind. "We were thinking of getting our marriage legally registered after the verdict. We will move in together, but there will be no social security," said Dey. Tomar's family has accepted their relationship, but Dey's family, though aware, doesn't "want relatives to know about it". Dey said, "If the Supreme Court's verdict had been favourable, it would have helped change people's outlook on same-sex marriage."
Calling the verdict "deeply disappointing", Sonal Giani said, "It just felt like there was a hesitancy to assert judicial leadership. They could have safeguarded minority rights, but the judgment overall was conservative." Giani and her partner have been discussing adopting a child and were hopeful of doing so ahead of the verdict. "Eventually, nothing new happened," she said.
Digital marketing analyst Yash, 25, disclosed that his partner was hoping to come out to his family. "He wanted to have a safe space before taking that step, but today's Supreme Court ruling has left him, and us, extremely unhappy. In the Indian armed forces, he has endured homophobia for six years," said Yash. "Though we find ourselves at ground zero again, let's see how the committee works and when. We only have hope left."
Yash's 24-year-old partner texted him after the verdict. "I just want you to know, irrespective of this judgment, we are going to make it. We will be together, we will go on all the trips, we will get a house, get a big frame of our wedding picture and make it work. Paper or not, we will be married," the optimism-filled message said.
Moving from Delhi to Mumbai has helped 25-year-old Rudradaman Singh, a CSR consultant, because he said Mumbai has a more open culture with regard to queer couples. "The verdict doesn't change anything on the ground for my partner and me," said Singh. "Basic things like trying to rent a house are difficult in Delhi. I encountered some unpleasant situations and that was a major reason why I shifted to Mumbai where I feel more accepted and have bigger numbers." He, however, saw something positive in the committee to be set up on same-sex marriage.
All dreams of Kushagara Sharma and his partner were squashed on Tuesday. "Last year I came out to my mother who lives in Uttar Pradesh and to my surprise, she quickly accepted me and my partner. More than me, my mother was looking forward to favourable verdict," said Sharma, adding, "If the verdict had granted legal validity to same-sex marriage, then we would have gotten married right away. But now, we may have to think about leaving the country and moving to one where gay marriage is legal."
Law student Arin felt the queer community deserved more. "I was wondering what the point of a relationship was if we couldn't adopt a child to start a family," said the 21-year-old. "It has become difficult to live in this country which has so much hatred for the community." Arin, who started dating Keshu over a year ago, hoped that the legislatures would make policy changes in favour of the queer community.
Expressing its dismay same-sex marriage not receiving legal assent, Ranjana Prasad, member, Delhi Commission for Protection of Child Rights, said, "The court should have provided some clarity on legal adoption of children by same-sex couples. Anyway, in our country the adoption process even for heterosexual couples is complicated and time-taking. There are numerous children who have to wait for years to get adopted. Keeping that in mind, the Supreme Court should have laid down better guidelines for the adoption process." Earlier, during the hearings in the same-sex case, DCPCR had supported the pleas seeking legal recognition of same-sex marriages in India and had even filed an intervening application in the Supreme Court.