Toxic positivity and how to spot it

Chennai: Browsing through the positive posts put up on social media did help Abhinav Swaminathan during the pandemic. But, when he lost his grandmother recently to Covid-19, the same posts became jarring.

"The algorithm is set based on my activity so ‘positive’ posts keep cropping up on my timeline. But it gets annoying when you see a grim news item followed by three or four influencers talking about just spreading ‘positive vibes’. I had to unfollow them to reset my algorithm," says the 29-year-old IT professional from Madipakkam. "It is good to be positive, but sometimes these posts on positivity make me feel confused and my emotions seem invalid."

During the pandemic, there has been great stress on the need to stay positive and spread happy vibes. On social media, influencers and life coaches with no background in the psychological sciences continue spreading ‘positivity’. But while staying upbeat, expressing gratitude and having a sunny outlook to life is good, the unrelenting stress on having to plaster a smile on your face and be constantly cheerful even while dealing with the grim reality is leading to a culture of toxic positivity on the internet, one that’s taking a toll on the mental health of many people.

Divija Bhasin, a Delhi-based counselling psychologist and social media influencer, has been making Instagram reels and videos for more than a year. With a double master’s in psychology, Bhasin makes content on mental well-being. Her series ‘Psychologist’s Review of Reels’ calls out content creators who spread fake information on mental health issues such as obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) and depression.

"There is too much wrong information on mental wellness. Most of them focus on smiling every day and being happy as cures to serious mental health issues. While they could be helpful, they are not going to cure anything," says the 24-year-old, who uses movies and other pop culture content to spread awareness about the importance of therapy during Covid-19. Packaging facts in an interesting manner without being preachy is key, she says. "This is important when it comes to spotting the difference between content that is positive and one that promotes toxic positivity," says Bhasin.

For, toxic positivity ignores the realities, such as trauma. "What is the positive side to trauma? We need to first accept our pain and negative emotions to heal," she says. Even people’s bios on social media profiles that say "spreading positive vibes" and "hustle hard, spread only positivity" can be toxic in nature. "We should be realistic rather than positive in times such as this," she says.

Influencers, though well-intentioned, can cause more damage, especially since they are not trained psychiatrists or psychologists, says Bhasin. "I have seen one who confuses being organized with obsessive compulsive disorder, and another who provides "cures" for depression," she says.

While Bhasin believes mental health content should be created only by mental health professionals, Anna Nagar-based consultant psychiatrist Dr Vikas Prabhav says life coaches and influencers form a crucial part of the mental health system.

He says there is a thin line between positive and toxic positive content. "If you feel guilty of experiencing negative emotions as everyone around you is telling you to be positive, it can impair your daily functioning," he says.

In a period of collective trauma, one must come to terms with the inevitability of pain. "Using positivity to distract from pain can stop healing. If motivational messages on positivity make you feel guilty or not positive enough, just block or unfollow it," says Dr Prabhav.

Celebrity and social media influencer who promotes positivity by mentioning the importance of seeking help and taking breaks on social media is Gabriella Natalie Charlton. The 21-year-old, who has been vocal about mental wellness, does not have a background in psychology. However, the reality-show star who recently contracted Covid-19, speaks on seeking professional help and encourages her 1 million followers to fully experience negative emotions and pain.

"Putting out messages on positivity can be tricky as I have so many young followers who can be easily influenced. I cannot force someone to overlook the difficulties they might be going through, that’s when my content would become toxic," she says.

However, some people find following the right influencers online helpful at a time when they are forced to be in isolation. "Consumers also play a huge role in understanding what content is toxic. While we cannot control larger things like the pandemic, we can control what we consume online," says Devanandsha D, a 30-year-old consultant.