Allan and Barbara Pease reveal the secret of a lasting marriage to Shobhaa De at Times LitFest Kolkata

Men and women and are not good or bad. They are just different. So appreciate the differences and formulate strategies to make the relationship work. This is the secret recipe for a long lasting marriage suggested by couple, authors and relationship experts Barbara and Allan Pease in conversation with Shobhaa De at the Times Kolkata Lit Fest 2018 at the Tollygunge Club on a wonderful Sunday morning.

"None of us would like to get married to a spouse who is exactly like us. It will take all the fun out of the marriage. Appreciate the differences with your partner and work on strategies to make the relationship work," said Barbara.

One is bound to take the advice seriously if it is coming from a couple who have been married for 30 years, have six children, seven grand children and have never thought of divorce but the "thought of murder did cross their minds" a few times.

"We have our own social experiment going on at home with children from different generations and grand children always giving us insight into how the younger generations think," said husband and partner Allan.

There was a scurry in the audience to click pictures with the couple and extract a few tips out of them for a "happy marriage".

"Men are monotracked while women are wired to multi track," said Allan.